When the Emperor Has No Clothes

May 20, 2010

Remember the classic tale of the emperor who had no clothes? Popularized in 1837 by Hans Christian Anderson, the story is summarized in Wikipedia like this:

An emperor who cared for nothing but his wardrobe hired two weavers who promised him the finest suit of clothes from a fabric invisible to anyone who was unfit for his position or “just hopelessly stupid.” The emperor could not see the cloth himself, but pretended that he could for fear of appearing stupid or unfit for his position. His ministers did the same. When the swindlers reported that the suit was finished, they dressed him in mime and the emperor then marched in procession before his subjects. A child in the crowd called out that the emperor was wearing nothing at all. The cry was taken up by others. The emperor cringed, suspecting the assertion was true, but held himself up proudly and continued the procession.

In this story, with whom can you identify? Where would you best fit into the plot?

Certainly, no one wants to be the self-centered authority figure oblivious to reality. Neither do we aspire to be “yes men” who refrain from speaking the truth for fear of looking stupid or being punished for political incorrectness. Of course, the dishonest weavers would never be our heroes.

But what about all the people who lined the parade route? They went along with the game until someone dared to speak the obvious truth.

Personally, I identify best with the innocent child who demonstrated transparency and authenticity. (He would have loved living in the 2.0 world of social media.) Read the rest of this entry »

2 Comments | Life in General | Permalink
Posted by Duane Hallock

My Week in Greensburg after the Deadly Tornado

May 4, 2010

Three years ago tonight an exceptionally violent tornado destroyed 95 percent of Greensburg, Kansas. With winds more than 200 miles an hour, the rare EF-5 twister claimed 10 fatalities in this town of 1,400. The tornado was 1.7 miles wide and it flattened nearly 1,000 homes and destroyed almost all businesses. Additionally, thousands of picture albums, family heirlooms and other irreplaceable possessions were lost forever.

For seven nights and eight days I represented the American Red Cross in its disaster relief efforts. My role as a Public Affairs Supervisor provided me with unusual access to the restricted areas. When I first parked my Red Cross vehicle, I walked through what was left of the town and saw firsthand the widespread devastation. Block after block after block, houses and businesses were gone. Thick steels bars were wrapped around the stumps of huge oak trees. Cars were upside down under layers of brick, wood and concrete. The drug store, the local café and the post office had been blown away.

I took nearly 500 pictures, though they inadequately captured the magnitude of the devastation. Without using clichés I found it difficult to describe the destruction. Yes, it looked like a war zone. From its appearance, the town could have been leveled by a huge bomb.

Community Connectedness

The people of Greensburg lost everything, or so it seemed to me as an observer. Yet they were grateful for what they had – their lives, their families, and each other. What impressed me most about this rural Kansas community was the incredible human spirit. These hardy individuals rose to the occasion. Despite their loss, the townspeople stood strong. From across the nation, they were surrounded by strangers who were united in one common cause – helping the storm victims to heal and to rebuild their lives. Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

Do You Ask Good Questions?

April 28, 2010

When I taught marketing at a local university, I received curious looks from students when I would say, “I hope you’re not here to learn marketing answers.”

After letting them wrestle with that concept for a moment, I would continue by saying, “The reason I am here is to stimulate your curiosity so that you ask good marketing questions.”

Too often we mistakenly assume that the goal of education is to find the right answers. We obsess unnecessarily with that pursuit—finding correct answers.

We would be much wiser to focus on asking good questions. From my experience, I have learned that answers magically appear at the right time when coaxed out of hiding by positive, affirming questions.

We’ve all worked for a boss or been around someone who compensated for his insecurity by always having to provide the right answers. I’ve never been impressed with know-it-alls. Rather, I hope to be surrounded by individuals who are curious, inquisitive and vulnerable. They recognize that life is a journey and the pathway is best illuminated when we ask insightful, probing and provocative questions.

“It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.”

Don’t you love that quote from James Thurber?

Want to test your own skills? Why not leave a comment below in the form of a question? Can you help move this conversation forward—not by offering an opinion—but by asking an interesting question?

3 Comments | Life in General | Permalink
Posted by Duane Hallock

Giving Thanks in the Tough Times

March 24, 2010

If you’re like me, there are times in life when you wonder if you’re caught in a bad dream. You want to pull the covers over your head and sleep it off, hoping you’ll awake to a completely different reality.

I’ve had three such times—1) being diagnosed with cancer, 2) losing a job and 3) dealing with my mother’s unexpected death last month.

Journaling is a practice that helps me get through those rough, white-water times. As I write, I deliberately focus on positive thoughts, thinking of all the things I have to be thankful for in spite of my circumstances.

As I’ve tried to mend the hole torn in my heart with Mom’s passing, I’ve developed a lengthy list of things that I’m thankful for. This has already been an essential part of my grieving and healing process. Here’s a partial list of what I’ve come up with so far: Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

Journaling through the Tough Times

March 17, 2010

We all experience difficult times in life, and we each find different ways to help us get through those times. Meditation, prayer and physical exercise are common methods we use.

I have found the practice of journaling to be especially effective.

Journaling for Comfort

Last month when my mom died unexpectedly I received an e-mail from a friend and former co-worker. She also lost her mother unexpectedly within the past year, so she expressed her condolences and then passed along some practical wisdom, saying, “A dear friend told me the day after mom died to keep a diary of those first few days. You may think you’ll never want to remember them but there comes a day when you’ll look back on a particular kindness or a surprise visitor and smile.”

Though it’s been less than a month since Mom died, I’ve already filled more than 20 pages in my journal. I also kept a detailed timeline of everything that happened during the first week. I instinctively knew that the events transpiring during that surreal time would soon become a blur and my memory would inadequately recall everything. Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

Would You Rather Be Creative or Innovative?

March 10, 2010

If you had to chose, would you rather be creative or innovative?

How does creativity differ from innovation? The best explanation I’ve seen comes from Theodore Levitt, Professor of Business Administration at Harvard University. For years I have carried around the following quote from the professor:

Creativity thinks up new things.  Innovation does new things.

There is really no shortage of creativity or of creative people in American business.  The shortage is of innovators.  The major problem is that so called “creative” people often pass on to others the responsibility for getting down to brass tacks.  They have plenty of ideas but little business-like follow-through.  They themselves are the bottleneck.  They make none of the right kind of effort to help their ideas get a hearing and a try.

Does that help to clarify the choice between creativity and innovation?

We all have ideas about how to fix various problems. We often think of creative ways to meet new challenges. With little effort we can even come up with suggestions on how someone else can do his or her job better. We can easily create lengthy “to do” lists for those around us. The much harder assignment is to be innovative and to actually do what it takes to make a difference.

So, back to the question:  Which would you rather be—creative or innovative? (Hint:  it’s a trick question.)

I think the question itself is faulty. For me, this is never an either/or proposition.

The best choice is both. I want 1) to be creative and think up new things and also 2) to be innovative and do new things. How about you?

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Posted by Duane Hallock

A Tribute to Mom on Her Birthday

March 5, 2010

Mom looked healthy in this photo taken less than a week before she unexpectedly died. (Photo taken by my brother Gary)

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Today would have been Mom’s 81st birthday. Sadly, last week our family gathered to bury Mom who died suddenly from cardiac failure. At her funeral, I fought back tears to read a tribute I’d written in her honor. With only slight editing, here’s what I shared with family and friends who had gathered to honor the special lady we all loved.

__________________________

Thank you for being here. Your presence means a lot to the family, especially to Dad, Gary and me.

Earlier this week we received ongoing updates on who was planning to be here. We learned that Mom’s brothers, nephews, nieces and grandchildren would be traveling from California, Tennessee, Iowa, Illinois, Kansas, Minnesota, Missouri and Colorado.

As the list grew longer, I kept thinking, “This is great! Mom will be so happy to see everyone.”

Then I’d get choked up as my new reality quickly set in. This time we were not planning another family reunion. Nor a 50th anniversary celebration. Nor the wedding of one of Mom’s grandchildren.

Sadly, this is not one of those happy events. We have come here to mourn. We have suffered a big loss, and we are here to grieve.

But we have also gathered to celebrate the joy and the love and the happiness that Mom brought into each of our lives. Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

Things I Love about My Wife

December 29, 2009

Today is my 35th wedding anniversary. Carol and I were married on a cold winter night in her hometown of Cincinnati.

We met in college and then continued dating when separated by hundreds of miles. Geography couldn’t keep us apart. I remember telling a man next to me on an airplane, “I’m flying home to Colorado from Tennessee where I attend college. My fiancée is from Ohio but she’s a university student in California and currently working as an intern in Florida.”

Now, 35 years later, we live in Kansas City and I’ve taken time to reflect on some of the reasons I love my wife more and more with each passing day.

  1. We are so much alike. We share the same priorities—family, faith, friends, finances, etc., etc.
  2. We are so different. I’m a marketing guy and she’s an accountant. Need I say more? The fact that I’m from Mars and she’s from Venus makes life much more interesting.
  3. We share so many memories. We’ve experienced so much together that I can hardly remember my life B.C. (Before Carol). We’ve lived our lives together “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer.” Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

The Influential People in Our Lives

December 21, 2009

This month I was saddened to learn of the death of a very influential man in my life. My career mentor, Milton Murray, died at age 87.

During the first 10 years of my career, Mr. Murray was the most influential person in my professional development. Somehow the label “mentor” understates the profound influence of this larger-than-life man.

I first met Mr. Murray at the airport in Nashville, Tennessee while I was still a college student. He later helped me land my first job at a hospital in Kansas City where he was serving as a fundraising consultant. During the next four years I spent countless hours with him. I was a dry sponge soaking up the endless flow of wisdom from this wise, old sage. (At the time, anyone over 30 seemed old.)

As my career progressed, he introduced me to another of his clients—a hospital in Portland, Oregon. I moved my family there and for the next four years I had the privilege of continuing my education under the guidance of this great man. He taught me so much about fundraising, communications, nonprofit management, office politics and life in general. Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

The Hidden Value of Job Hunting During the Holidays

December 10, 2009

It’s tough looking for a job in December. I’ve been there, and I know it’s not fun being in a job search during the holidays.

Right now, I personally know at least three dozen people who are between jobs. Though they’ve remained positive during these stressful times, it’s very easy to become overwhelmed with fear and negativity. Few employers are hiring in December. The economy is still bad and who knows what the future holds. On top of that, personal finances are likely strained during this season of materialism and consumerism.

On the other side of the coin, though, the holiday season can actually be a deeply meaningful time for job hunting. Done rightly, December can be a time of renewal and rejuvenation as you anticipate all the good things awaiting you in the coming new year.

Here’s my advice to anyone feeling trapped in a holiday job search:

  1. Spend quality time with family and friends. A stressful career transition can refocus you on life’s true priorities—family and friends. Surround yourself with people who truly care about you and your well-being. Let them know how important they are to you.
  2. Reconnect with your existing network. Update your professional contacts on the progress (or lack of) you are making. Remind them what you’re looking for. Suggest simple ways they can help. Look for ways to express gratitude for things they have already done.
  3. Make new friends. The holidays are a good time to network and meet new people at parties, religious services or other social events.
  4. Rethink your strategy. From time to time, we all need to think about what we’re doing and why. For me, nothing works quite like sitting alone in a coffee shop. I can clear the clutter in my mind, filter out distractions and experience a surge of creativity. The change of venue gives me a fresh perspective. Read the rest of this entry »

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Posted by Duane Hallock

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